Unfortunately, if you don't get this job accomplished before all of the snow melts, your poop parfait could turn into poop soup. As a result, your yard will emit a smell that only a dung beetle could love. Left untouched, the grass might be ruined. These wafting remnants could make you as popular as board members of AIG. This is a time when Winnipeggers can give thanks we don't pay for our garbage by the bag. It's also a time to ponder why we didn't become fish lovers.

I'd like to share a couple of tips that might aid you in accomplishing this yearly task. Honestly, it should be my husband giving you these hints. He's the one who cleans the yard. As much as this isn't a popular job, it's his for life. This was the agreement we made when I had our twins: I'd do their diapers and he'd take care of pet excrement -- forever. After he examined this year's backyard remnants, I think he regrets making the deal.